Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
