singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Ok just don't go to jail. I saw your account balance. It can't take that.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
He said he looked out his window and I was sitting in the grass with blood everywhere talking to a dog.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Well, I guess my plans of staying around the apartment and drinking my weight in boxed wine are ruined. I have a date tonight.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
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