Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
OK BUT WHO THE FUCK FORGTS A LIVE CHICKEN IN MY HOUSE
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
