I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
My vagina is officially offended.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
