When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
He set 8 alarms to make sure I took my birth control on time..
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
The housekeeper found my huge dildo under the bathroom sink, and another in the living room. I can't get much more single than this.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
