nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
I just woke up in a puddle of boob sweat. Definitely time to consider a reduction.
didn't know how to tell his mom I was confused about how long we'd been together because we banged for a full year before making it official
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize