i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Apparently I walked up to him, mumbled something incoherently, then started to make out with him. Why does this always happen.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Randomize
