"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
benefit of terrorism--they won't let you buy random one way plane tickets to random parts of the country for no reason nonmatter how high you are.
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Im so fucked up I'm drinking baileys and coffee just to stay awake.
It's 6 in the afternoon?
Randomize
