Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
How did I end up in the pool?!
Welcome to ASU
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
I think as a general rule I have to have blacked out somewhere at least twice to be comfortable.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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