Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
