One girl and one boy is just not enough.
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Who invented hangovers? And why did I make out with him and eat an entire can of chilli mixed with hot fries while screaming "YOU ONLY GRADUATE ONCE" last night?
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
I'm hungry and horny. DEADLY COMBINATION.
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