I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I still can't believe a guy pooped in my backyard
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
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