i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
I swear I can feel something in my uterus. Like, I can feel his sperm searching for an egg. Wtf...
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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