what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Ok, let's play "if you were a slut" again and try and retrace our steps last night..
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
