We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I love the fact that my Mom has been present at 90% of my drug deals.
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
He hand fed me trail mix then I watched the video of me the next morning. He was actually feeding me meow mix.....that drunk. I still have no regrets marrying him
It's been THREE DAYS. Why do I still have the munchies?!
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
