yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
If a guy called my cleavage "mesmerizing" but is kinda related to me, does it still count?
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
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