She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Apparently throwing balloons filled with vodka off the roof is considered terrorism.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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