I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
Pretty sure he sprained my tongue. This is why you don't hook up with gingers.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
we told you you couldn't get your dick sucked because you were a girl and you yelled at us and said we were 'discriminating you'
I'm too high and old for this...
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