I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
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