btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
Drunken horseback riding is the absolute worst decision i've ever made in my life.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
Randomize
