We stopped her at 12
12 shots? Or 12 midnight?
Which answer would freak you out less
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Well we did eat French fries lady-and-the-tramp style last night...
Have you ever just woke up in the morning and felt pregnant
she and her cat are both sick as fuck so they just sat there looking at each other with her nose dripping on the cat's. both out of fucks
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
I just washed down my antidepressant with some pineapple wine. I'm the picture of mental health this holiday season
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