do you think they make care bear costumes for cats?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
It's like I'm snorkeling in an ocean of tequila.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
Randomize
