she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Apparently I confessed my love for him last night. Also, my love for cash4gold commercials.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
Everybody shut up a minute, we need to discuss how much nicer the world would be if pants weren't a thing.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
Randomize
