nut hugger
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
she asked me what the final straw was. i had to tell her i caught him jerking off to digimon porn. i don't know what i'm more upset by, that he was masturbating to cartoons, or that he was masturbating to sub-par cartoons
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
So his roommate walked in on us, went upstairs to tell her bf she has found a new use for the rafters & they must try it.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
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