i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Aaaaand now he just flexed his muscles at me and said "I'm a fucking eagle!"
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
The last time I saw you, you were giving the stripper a lap dance.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
Randomize