just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I really need to find better places to throw up. I would like to be able to use the bathroom sink the next morning for brushing my teeth
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I knew he was a classy dude because when I told him my name was Jen he said "Gin? Like Gin & Juice?"
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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