Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I take no responsibility of who alcohol hooks up with using my body!
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
He suck his junk in my HALF BAKED. Ben & Jerry would totally disapprove. This is worse than sticky dick donut day.
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
Randomize