im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
The air was thick with penises
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize
