hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
