all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
Randomize
