its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
in honor of breaking bad starting soon, i am now banging a walter white lookalike. viva heisenberg!
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
Randomize
