Mattress luging...It's a long story.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Just had a threesome with a hot Turkish guy and an even hotter French lawyer. This what happens when I travel alone. You have only yourself to blame for this.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
Well I shit myself on the way home from work today so there's that...
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize
