she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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