He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
