So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Something about finishing sexting a guy and him going "well. I have to get ready for Passover now" really makes me rethink my life choices
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
Randomize
