is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
mondays should just be called national damage control day
I just remember thinking that if i ran really fast through the house, no one would notice i was naked.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
Randomize
