There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Just did a kegstand with my dad. Happy fathers day.
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
