i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Company meeting and there he was. Felt a little weird like 'last night you were telling me how your dick loves me, and now we're listening to a report on sales figures'.
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
Apparently during my blackout I walked over to Troy, grabbed my crotch, and said “Eat Fresh” while his GF was with him. FML
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