so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
handjob tips. give me some.
No, he will live forever, like cockroaches and Jack Bauer.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
I only spent $42 at the bar last night, it's some sort of miracle.
you do remember it was dollar beer night, right?
That answers my next five questions
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
