a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
Haha holy fuck. i dont remember much after pissing on your ex's flaming nude pics.
Randomize
