I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I have a new drinking limit. I'll stop when I know I'm going to untag the picture that was just taken of me.
pretty sure that I broke my nose during sexting. Life is grand.
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
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