I don't understand why she insists on me walking her to the door. She came over for literally 8 minutes, we had sex, and now I need her to leave. That fake chivalry will change nothing about the situation.
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
Only thing exciting about him was his dick.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Is it wrong that I have to schedule a family Sunday brunch around my mom's weekly banging of my stepdad. And why do I even know this??
Randomize
