How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
It’s the biggest dick I’ve ever seen. His IQ drops 25 points when he’s hard because there’s no blood going to his brain
Randomize
