i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
I don't want to go back to the suburbs. Being drunk in public isn't ok and theres too many children. Don't make me.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
