i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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