You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
I can't wait til my little brother reaches the point where puking doesn't mean we stop drinking
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Oh shit. The hangover. It has taken 20 mins and 5 attempts to tie my shoelaces
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
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