wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
Fuck underwear. Let's get stoned and eat ravioli.
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
