i'm 85% sure that if you don't visit me i will do something awkward and potentially dangerous to you in your sleep involving chocolate milk and a sham-wow.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Just got a message from a guy on a dating site who says he helped me remove lime pulp from my eye in a club toilet 2 weeks ago.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
I just got woken up by some Christians who wanted to talk about the bible. ways to make a hangover even worse for a thousand trebek
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
The first thing you did was give us a tour of the house and showed us who was "on-limits" and "off-limits"
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
Randomize
