i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
I need a "closed for the season, thanks for a great summer" sign for my vagina
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Randomize
