Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
after the fucking you spent twenty minutes vomiting naked and shaking your dick at my roommates. luckily, i don't remember that, or i'd have to be really insulted.
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point đź’ś
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
