And he showed us your test. You wrote what is this shit and scribbled on it? Nice 3%..
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
she pinky promised me she was 18
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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