so that wasnt chicken after all
it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
